Men can learn a great deal from marriages that have gone to seed
It seems odd advising men to learn a lesson or two from couples that have split. But if you listen to divorce lawyers they give sensible advice worth following.
Expert counselors say that the vast majority of couples become victims of inertia. If partners had been willing to mend fences, they could have saved their marriage. If you follow these tips you won’t end up in a lawyer’s office.
The marriage vows to “love, cherish, and obey” don’t fool-proof the union from internal and external pressure. You’re still prone to the discord that could flare up into something serious. The golden rule of marriage is that one should not take one’s partner for granted. The fact that you’ve got her on your side is laudable. You need to ensure that she remains with you every single day.
Remind yourself how beautifully you courted your lady love. You opened doors for her, you remembered to celebrate her festive days with flowers, and you had her in your sight all the time. Back then, these gestures proved your love and they’ll continue to bring happiness if only you keep following them.
The biggest casualty of working hard to earn a livelihood and raising a family is intimacy. The physical and emotional bonding that binds the couple takes a pounding. Couples need to leave work pressures at the workplace and set aside their addiction to smartphones and social media. Partners need to hold hands, snuggle up and bond over a candle lit dinner. Like that candle, they need to keep the flames of their passion alive.
The marriage strengthens when couples keep talking to each other instead of talking at each other. Guys and gals returning from work can’t afford to shut themselves in their problematic worlds. They need to open up and discuss their feelings, ambitions, and anxieties. Look out for each other. Make sure you know what your partner is going through. Having some alone time is great for de-stressing but together times should be vibrant.
We all come into the world with our baggage of imperfections. So stop expecting your partner to be the icon of perfection. Always keep your partner on a taller pedestal than yourself and give them the impression that you are always there to catch them if they fall. The expectations you had before marrying need not remain a fantasy; you simply work harder to make the fantasy come alive in real life.
Happiness is a precious commodity in marriage. It may take a dent or two as you ride the bumpy highway of your potholed journey. Just remind yourself that pain and pleasure have their own rewards particularly when both partners share a great love for each other. Every crisis has the seeds of its own solution, and when you have two heads thinking in unison, the worst case scenarios can be overcome easily.
Last but not the least; remember that you are no longer a bachelor boy but a team that is forged to weather every kind of storm that may come your way. It’s nice telling your partner, “Why should I fear when you are here.”